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Showing posts from March, 2023

An Age Old Question, Still Unanswered And Cheaters Failuires.

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I would absolutely be thrilled if a question or two about human behavior could be answered. It seems there are a few questions out there that to this very day, nobody seems to have a logical answer for.  For example, why do women choose men who treat them badly? When they have a choice between a good man who will put her first, and make her his world, or a guy that really does not care and will disrespect them at every turn. Another one, why cheat? When you can end the relationship you are currently in, and then start wild sex games with another? Why not make it easier for everyone, and less heartbreaking? One that really gets me is- Why stay in a relationship with someone you don't really respect and like? These questions all have toxic written all over them. I still don't understand why people do the things they do in relationships, and I don't believe I have ever gotten a clear answer on any of them that make sense. So, please feel free to comment and school me if you be

The New 411 On Couples Therapy

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 There are couples out there that still have terrible fights but are not yet willing to give up on one another. There is so much that goes into a good working well oiled relationship. Besides the basic commandments necessary like truth, communication, respect. There are many things you can do with yourself to learn how to be a better listener or communicator. Learn how to get out of yourself and be more of a giving and doing person for your partner. Some of us don't know how to give gifts. Everyone is different, and almost no one comes as the full package. There are things we have to learn and things we need to let go of.  We are all raised differently with different beliefs and ways of seeing our reality. Not all of us know how to fight in the most healthy way. This is when it might be a good time to call in a professional. Maybe one who wears a whistle like a referee. Just kidding, but that may seem what you need for some.  There is actually evidence-based research that is sugges

It's All What You Get From It

  "You don't learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing, and falling over."- Richard Branson How many people are finding themselves like I have been, thinking of the past? Wonder how things could be different if we had not made a mistake in the past. " I wish I would have dated that guy with money" "I could not have a worry if I had!"  So you are 40 and still have not found your footing. This does not mean you have to keep beating yourself up. Let's face it, that really does nothing but keep us in a negative space with a negative attitude. Right? "How can we encourage ourselves to not live on regrets but, know how to learn from mistakes. Maybe it is all in the way we view it. That could be the way we determine how quickly we can dust off, and continue on. The mistake could be viewed as the doorway to learning more about ourselves. You can learn how much knowledge you have of yourself, and how far you are actually willing to go. Maybe

For Women In Toxic Relationships

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You may have heard the term "gaslighting" before now, but most women have not heard of the word until they are face-to-face with a gaslighter being manipulated, and made to believe a host of lies. This is the most inhumane form of abuse on women and it happens more than I like to think. Because it is so covert and sneaky it will sneak up on you, and will not even know what has happened until you are all alone and questioning your sanity. Most people do not even know this sort of psychological trickery exists. Why would they? It is not something that comes up in everyday conversation, and the woman who has fallen victim to it or survived it does not make it front-page news. If anything they feel to blame or embarrassment keeps them from sharing their story. Their gaslighter will do their job and have you thinking you are dumb to let this happen, or that it is your fault and you deserve this. So, of course, you don't speak about it. To me, this is just such a sick and twist

20 Things To Do Daily To Promote Happiness In Your Relationship

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We all go through our days with our routines, and simple hum-drum ways of completing the day. We are happy overall and the one thing that can for sure turn your day into the blues is a fight with your partner . I don't know about you, but this throws everything off kilter for me. I will find myself driving to work and yelling at nobody in the car. Looking like a crazed lunatic. I will not find a smile on my once friendly face. I will have a chip on my shoulder, a negative attitude, and all of this is because I'm hurt. Not angry. We all know that is a secondary emotion, right? Hurt drives all of this negative behavior, and I am not myself,and nothing runs as smooth as it did until I hear " I love you." Fall from his lips again. Then, poof everything is right in the world once again.  Sometimes we just get irritated and take it out on the person we know will forgive, we know will be there. We need to do things daily so that person is reminded of how special, and importa

The Commandments Of Dating

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" Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain." Mae West We have all been nervous before a date. Especially a date that is made on an app., and you have yet to meet this person face-to-face, but have gotten comfortable with your texting conversation. Not actually speaking to them. With the ability to type out so many of our personal interactions with others it becomes a strain to actually talk with another face-to-face. Nerve wracking. Will have you putting doubt in your own head before you even get out of the gate. DON'T LET THAT HAPPEN. First, know that you are a charismatic person, fun and hilarious to be around. You could turn any old boring party into a raving sensation that everyone will talk about for years to come it was so epic. Okay, maybe your not that fantastico, but we are trying to get that confidence pumped up here.  Low self-esteem and confidence shows and leads others to have the same thoughts about you. So, let's have

The Truthful Advice You Really Need.

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Relationship advice is a tricky thing. We all have a friend that loves to give unasked for advice, and tell us the pet peeves they have with our relationship. It can actually be downright annoying, and hurtful. When you are actually seeking out advice, it can be hard to find the answers your looking for. Especially if it is more of a definitive answer like " is my relationship healthy or unhealthy?" You don't want the go to advice you get from those passive friends either like " don't go to bed angry." Does this sound like something you have gone through or a struggle for someone you know? I found when answering relationship questions on Quora , that alot of individuals struggle with even asking the questions they face. Why? Because their relationship questions couldn't be answered on Cosmo magazine and didn't fit the cookie cutter fighting senerios. When they were seeing article titles like "How Not To Go To Bed Angry." Yet, they are fac