Are You The Real Deal?

 You hear people say to you, " Oh, don't kid yourself." or "Get to know the real you." We should know who we are and what it is we want in life. Although, some of us don't. Are we making it more difficult than it needs to be? I remember thinking to myself, " how can anyone know me better than, me?" Well although it sounds logical. Most of us are busy covering up who we really are.

There is an old saying "know thyself." I'm going to try to help you do this. When you are in therapy, your therapist never tells you who you are, but they ask questions and guide the conversation to help you find out who you are.

For starters leave all the judgments behind. If you are stubborn, stuck-up, or a bad person. None of these matters and that is really only comparing yourself to others. Can you tell me right now what is important in your life? If you answered this honestly and quickly, you are off to a good start.

Let's try a few other leading questions. Get some paper and jot down your answers or take some notes to go over this later if you want to reflect on it. So, what turns you on? When was the last time you really felt turned on, or the 6 times before that? The answer to these tells more than you think. Never turned on- : You deprive yourself and may have to peel layers at a time away to get rid of all the gloom that keeps the sunshine from lighting up your face.

When you can do what you please with your time, what exactly do you do? Do you find an activity or nap and daydreaming? If a person prefers a fantasy world and daydreaming, they could lack real satisfaction. However, if you are the type of worker that may not like the task at hand, you're going to do your best job, anyway. This obviously means you get pleasure out of a job well done. Whereas the person who complains about the work. May feel like they force their labor and resent it all together.

What do you usually think of before you fall asleep?

When you try to answer these questions don't be too serious or down. If you take it a little more lightly, you might find the answers come more easier. Also, be nice to yourself. Don't put yourself down if you don't think you are finding the person you should be. You need to be understanding and root for your own team. Be on your side. Even though you may find you want to change your life in some ways still try to respect the life, you have lived and how you did so.

When you can look at yourself and be fair and honest, then it is possible for you to face some truths. Can you deal with the fact that you're not perfect? Can you admit to yourself your character flaws or do you lie to yourself about them? Worse yet. Do you try to lie to the people who know you? Doesn't it make sense in your life to step back, take stock of the person you are, and if need be reshape some things about yourself? Taking inventory is difficult, but maybe you have found it hard because you are trying to play a part that is not actually you. Or convince others you are someone that is not you, even though they can see by your actions. 

Although we come pre-packaged with our skin tone and eye color, and our sex. But you are much of what you have made and if you find you are not pleased with that it is your right to do a better job. So put yourself together and get as close to your real deal as you dare.